Two men playing golf were held up by two women playing in front of them.
One man said: “I’ll walk up to them and tell them to hurry up.”
When he returned he said: “I have a problem, one of the women is my wife and the other one is my mistress.”
The second man said: “I’ll walk up to them and hurry them up.”
He came back and said: “We both have the same problem.”
Three tourists were driving through Wales.
As they were approaching Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town’s name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch.
As they stood at the counter one asked the blonde employee, “Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are… very slowly?”
The girl leaned over the counter and said, “Burrrrrr, gerrrrrr, Kiiiiiing.”
A man went to a specialist because he was suffering from premature ejaculation.
When asked how the treatment was going the doctor said it was touch and go.
Bob meets Bill at the bar after work and is once again looking down in the dumps.
“What’s wrong now Bob,” asked Bill.
Bob replies, “They called in a management team and gave everyone in the office an aptitude test to see what they were best suited for.”
“Yeah, so what’s the problem with that,” asks Bill.
Bob sighs, “Well it seems that I am best suited for unemployment.”
A young bride tells her friend, “Paul keeps telling everyone he’s going to marry the most beautiful girl in the world.”
“What a shame! And after all the time you’ve been engaged!”
