Exams

Posted by: Joe King  /  Category: All Jokes, Students

“How are you getting on with your exams?”

“Not bad. The questions are easy enough – it’s the answers I have trouble with!”

An old outfit

Posted by: Joe King  /  Category: All Jokes, Marriage

On my 40th birthday I waltzed out of my bedroom dressed in an old outfit I dug out of the back of the closet.

“I wore this on my 30th birthday! I guess that means my wardrobe is ten years old,” I said to my husband, hoping he’d take the hint and buy me some clothes as a present.

“Or,” he offered instead, “it means when you were 30 you had the body of a 40-year-old.”

So dirty

Posted by: Joe King  /  Category: All Jokes, Kids

“Glen, why do you always get so dirty?” Asked the teacher.

“Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.” He replied

The Wong Family

Posted by: Joe King  /  Category: All Jokes, Doctor, Family

Su Wong marries Lee Wong. The next year, the Wong’s have a new baby.

The nurse brings over a lovely, healthy, bouncy, but definitely Caucasian, white baby boy.

“Congratulations,” says the nurse to the new parents.

“Well Mr.Wong, what will you and Mrs. Wong name the baby?”

The puzzled father looks at his new baby boy and says, “well, two Wong’s don’t make a white, so I tink we name him Sum Ting Wong.

Virus

Posted by: Joe King  /  Category: All Jokes, Work

There is a new virus going around, called “work.”

If you receive any sort of “work” at all, whether via email, Internet or simply handed to you by a colleague … DO NOT OPEN IT.

This has been circulating around our building for months and those who have been tempted to open “work” or even look at “work” have found that their social life is deleted and their brain ceases to function properly.

If you do encounter “work” via email or are faced with any “work” at all, then to purge the virus, send an email to your boss with the words “I’ve had enough…I’m off to the pub.” The “work” should automatically be forgotten by your brain.

If you receive “work” in paper-document form, simply lift the document and drag the “work” to your garbage can. Put on your hat and coat and skip to the nearest bar with two friends and order three pints of beer (or rum punch). After repeating this action 14 times, you will find that “work” will no longer be of any relevance to you and that “Scooby Doo” was the greatest cartoon ever.

Send this message to everyone in your address book. If you do NOT have anyone in your address book, then I’m afraid the “work” virus has already corrupted your life.